i made a few observations a couple weeks ago. here's one of the more minor ones - i do not at all mind when strangers find excuses to walk around all sides of me to check out my tattoos without having to talk to me. this means that i - the one with social anxiety issues - am intimidating on some level. i can be the sweetest, most polite person in the world, and they are still curious and afraid. it leaves me feeling a couple of different things that are both sortof awesome at the same time. i may go into that deeper at some point.

more importantly tho..

i had a conversation with an awesome guy named Ryan who is a former drug addict who is 18 months clean. it got me thinking about my own past with addiction. and about the addictions of people around me.

i do not think Ryan overcame addiction in the purest form of the word. i think he, like most people, just switched his substance of choice. in Ryan's case, he went from crack to a 12 step program.

-noun, the state of being enslaved to a habit or practice or to something that is psychologically or physically habit-forming, as narcotics, to such an extent that its cessation causes severe trauma.

i had my own chemical and behavioral addiction problems in the past. my new substance of choice seems to be getting tattooed. much much more constructive than what it replaces.

the more i think about it the more i think just about everyone around me is addicted to *something.*
coffee. music. food. work. defeat. praise. self pity. fear. drama. people. antidepressants.

not all addictions are negative, tho. some of those things i'd love to see them replace with something more constructive. some of them are just fine.

the key with any addiction is to look at it and determine if it's constructive or not. recognize it for what it is and keep an eye on how close it's getting to being the ruling factor in your life. if it's even a little bit disruptive to your ability to live your life happily or to keep up with your responsibilities.. it's probably time to make a progression to a new substance or behavior.

February, 04 2011 under self


February, 17 2011 by Spiffy

I don't consider it an addiction unless it adversely affects your life... I've known people that drank a 12-pack a day and a held a steady job as a supervisor... people that need sex all the time with multiple people and still have a happy marriage... people that need to be with somebody for emotional fulfillment and are content with themselves... if it's not bad why call it an addiction? you're not enslaved... I think we all have personal addictions... it's things we crave... but we won't be knocking off liquor stores to support them...